I dunno what to even label this post...I'm just...so depressed and heartbroken.
Nothing - Nothing - is turning out the way I wanted.
"Well, that's life for ya", people say.
No, it's not - the people who say this had at least something in their life that went right.
They found something to make them happy.
Something to comfort them.
Something to keep them going.
I...I don't.
Most I have is a facet of my energy I can sleep with - doesn't make me any less lonely. I have this blog to air my grievances and struggles with existence, since I'm not allowed to do so where anyone can ever see it (apparently these pageviews I'm getting are just bots after all) or respond in a meaningful way, and that's about it.
I really don't have a reason to keep existing - but each day I keep going all the same.
So meaningless.
But I'm waiting it out until I die...hope that doesn't take too long.
Probably will.
I really wish I was worth more to Una than I apparently am. :'(
Fuck it all.
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